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Weird Al Yankovic - Amish Paradise ( Lyrics )
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Weird Al Yankovic - Amish ParadiseParody of Coolio feat. L.V - Gangsta's ParadiseLyricsAs I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain I take a look at my wife and realize she is very plain,But that's just perfect for an Amish like me You know I shun fancy things like electricity At four thirty in the morning I am milking cows Jabbadiah feeds the chickens an Jacob ploughs fool I've been milking and ploughing so long that even Hezekiel thinks that my mind is gone I 'm the man of the land I'm into discipline Got a bible in my hand and a beard on my chin But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine Then tonight we're gonna party like in sixteen ninety nine We been spending most our lives Living in an Amish paradise A churn butter once or twice Living in an Amish paradise It's hard work and sacrifice Living in an Amish paradise We sell cruets of discount rice Living in an Amish paradise A local boy kicked me in the butt last week I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek I really don't care in fact I wish him well Cause I will be laughing my head off When he's burning in hell but I have never punched a tourist even if he deserved it an Amish with a 'tude you know that's unheard of I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat and my homies agree I really look good in black fool if you come to visit you will be bored to tears we haven't even paid the phone bill in three hundred years But we aren't really quaint So please don't point and stare We're just technologicly impaired There's no phone,No life, No motorcar, Not a single luxury Like Robinson Crusoe It is primitive as can be We been spending most our lives Living in an Amish paradise We're just plain and simple guys Living in an Amish paradise There's no time for sin and vice Living in an Amish paradise We don't fight we all play nice Living in an Amish paradise Hitching up the buggy Churning lots of butter Rave the barn on Monday Soon I raise another Think you're really righteous Think you're pure of heart Then I know I am a million times as humble as thou art I'm the palmaceous little which I wan't to be like on my knees day and night scoring points for the after life So don't be vain, And don't be whiny Or else my brother I might have to get medieval on your hiny We been spending most our lives Living in an Amish paradise We're all crazy mentalitiesLiving in an Amish paradise There's no cops and traffic lights Living in an Amish paradise But you probably think it bites Living in an Amish paradise
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